X-Men: Apocalypse

movies, Uncategorized
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Image via Coming Soon

Let me preface this by saying, I’m an X-Men girl. I’ve read all the comics, seen all of the movies and television shows (including that random anime version) – heck, they’re constantly the background of my screensaver. So, I know X-Men. If you’re not up-to-date on all the X-Men going-ons, check out the trailer here:

And now with the review: I was disappointed. Because I was disappointed for quite a few reasons, I’m going to number them out (in no particular order) to make this easier to follow.

1) Apocalypse isn’t really that complicated

I feel as if half the movie was spent explaining to other people who Apocalypse is, what he wants, what he can do, where he came from, why he has so many followers, and on and on and on until I wanted to scream “I get it!” He’s the first mutant who’s basically a god. That’s all you had to say.

2) Too many characters done badly

We’ve seen a massive cast of characters done well in a film before: Captain America Civil War. That’s because characters were prefaced and set up in previous films, so that we were familiar with them as we sat and watched the movie. More than half of the characters we got in this film were new, introduced pretty badly (the Nightcrawler/Angel fight??) and no one had a satisfying character arc. No one.

3) The final fight …

We don’t go to super hero films to get an in-depth look into the human condition (or maybe you do). A huge part I go is because I want to see these awesome heroes with awesome powers fight it out, leaving a trail of chaos and destruction behind them. The final fight scene between Apocalypse’s horsemen and the X-Men was predictable, anti-climactic, and downright boring. As opposed to watching Cap, Bucky, and Iron Man beat the living daylights out of each other, this final fight scene of X-Men consisted of Jean Grey walking and yelling.

4) Magneto’s family

OK. No. No. I get that you wanted to show us that Magneto was trying to move on and live like a normal human, but that does not mean you can create an entire family just to kill them off. I don’t care what you say, that is the only reason his little family even existed in this film. And this probably upset me more than anything. Death isn’t the only way to create a difficult, painful situation for a character.

5) Psylocke wasn’t a character

She literally served zero purpose in this film and that’s that. Storm was there to introduce Apocalypse to this world. Angel died to show Apocalypse was a terrible person (like, duh). And Psylocke was … irrelevant. I love Olivia Munn, but she really didn’t need to be there.

6) It wasn’t all bad. 

I appreciated the 80s vibe, some of the cute banter, and all the kids taking a joyride in one of the professor’s cars to go see Return of the Jedi. And … yeah, that’s it.

This film is clear evidence that Twentieth Century Fox just needs to hand X-Men over to Marvel. Just … give it up. It’s not worth it if you keep botching up incredible and thoughtful characters and stories with more films like these.

 

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